thoughts and lessons

17 Sep


So a lot of my time lately has been given over to thinking.  Thinking about me, about D, about us, about work and money, stress and love, emotions and drama.  And everything in between.

Me and D had a pretty good fight the other day. Probably the first “real” fight with raised voices and me punching a door.  (I can’t punch hard enough to damage anything lol)  We hashed some things out though.  Turns out D is really burnt out on sex toy reviewing and doesn’t want anything to do with it.  That’s fine with me.  I’d been cutting back on it anyway.

The work situation is alright, but things are looking up.  I had an interview last week that went very well; they want me back for a second interview.  But, turns out they are rearranging some positions, don’t know if it’s to hire two of us that interviewed, have us as full time instead of part time or whatever but it’ll be a while before we hear back.  And, the place I write articles for right now is trying to hire me on officially, just remotely.  I am freelance contracted for them right now.  So that’s good.  If they do and I get offered the other job I’d just do the other one part time.

D had a job interview yesterday that went well.  They said we’d hear back in a couple days if he’s hired on.  It’s part time but anything is something!  Plus, they are looking for temp workers for over the holiday season, so if he’s passed up for the permanent position he is still in the running for that one.

I’ve realized that a lot of what’s happened after moving down here has been the Universe teaching me some lessons I’ve needed to learn.  While they’re things I’ve known intellectually, learning them through experience is a whole different matter.  We are a whole new level of poor in my experience.  I’ve never been well off, but I’ve never been where we are at right now.  I won’t be able to pay my phone bill this month unless one of us gets paid within the next 3 weeks.  We’re both constantly stressed out and every month is a matter of “food or bill?” It’s unacceptable in my opinion.  It’s to the point where something’s gotta give, ya know?  Today we choose doing laundry over getting more groceries.

Our landlord has been so awesome with us.  We explained what happened with my previous job right away and we’ve been up front and honest with her throughout all this.  So she’s been willing to work with us.  I got a gift card the other day and I ordered some body wash and a scented candle with it.  After how awesome she was with us today I’ve decided that when I get it (it should be delivered tomorrow or Monday) I’m going to give her the scented candle.  She knows I review so I’ll just be honest with her.  “We can’t tell you how much we appreciate how flexible you’ve been with us.  I got this free with my product reviewing so here’s a little gift to say thank you.”  We were debating what to do but some things are personal ya know? LOL I’m so not gonna give her a vibrator! I was thinking a massage set, which I may do for Yule or something.

Oh a happy note we found a couch that folds out into a bed an a futon mattress that fits it perfectly!  My back is so happy to be up off the floor, PLUS I can be on top during sex again!  It’s the little things, ya know?

But anyway yea.  I’ve been learning a lot.  There’s just so much difference between knowing something and being thankful you’re not dealing with it, and knowing something and wanting to stop living it.  We’re tired of living like this, and we are doing everything in our power to not be living it any longer.

Goddess but I hope D gets this job…

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Posted by on September 17, 2010 in daily life


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